Let’s examine this carefully.  What are the traditional ways to meet someone for potential romance or Polish dating?  Well, people meet through the workplace, at bars, nightclubs, at the grocery store, at school, through hobbies and interests, and through mutual friends.

Bars are not the ideal place to meet someone for romance.  Oftentimes, it is the place to meet someone for a night of sexual fulfillment (or disappointment).  Nightclubs fall into the same category.

The workplace can be a good place to meet a potential romantic partner, but this venue also has its drawbacks.  For example, if the romantic relationship between you and a co-worker does not work out, for whatever reason (you just weren’t compatible perhaps), then it makes the workplace that much more uncomfortable.  This experience can be terrible, especially if the ex who works with you is vindictive, and turns others (who once found you charming and funny) against you.

You can meet potential partners through your hobbies and interests.  This can happen in any number of venues, depending on your hobbies and interests.  A bibliophile (book lover), for example, would have opportunities to meet others at the library, a bookstore, a book discussion group, or even a class on literature.

One often meets many people at school, but this venue runs the same risk as the workplace, unless it is an interest course that doesn’t require you to see the ex and their entourage through four years of university, let’s say.  An interest course at night school, on the other hand falls under the category of interests and hobbies.

Meeting someone through mutual friends has one advantage and two distinct disadvantages.  The advantage is that your mutual friend can vouch for you and the person you meet, so you are both more open to trust each other sooner.  The disadvantages are as follows:  1. what qualities in a romantic partner that your friend thinks is good for you is not necessarily what you think is good for you.  2.  If you do hit it off with someone you met through mutual friends, if and when the romantic relationship falls apart, it would in turn affect your friendship with the person or people who your ex shares a friendship with as well.

With all these potential problems, and headaches, no wonder people are turning to online dating in droves, including speeddate and sites geared to ethnicity, like Russian or Polish dating.

Offhand I could speculate until I’m blue in the face as to why people use Polish Dating sites. Some seek romance.  Some perhaps are seeking fulfillment of sexual desire.  It is also possible that flirtatious contact with others through online chatting, messages, etc., in copious amounts can somehow boost one’s self-esteem.  Undoubtedly, if others find me interesting when I thought I only interested myself, then this can only make me feel good, powerful even – in a strange sort of way.

There is no one reason why people are using online dating sites, speed dating sites, and sites geared toward attracting someone of the opposite sex of a particular ethnicity (e.g. Asian dating, Russian dating, Polish dating).  They are many and varied, from the ones I mentioned in the first paragraph to the most mundane reasons.

Online dating sites obviously have some distinct advantages to traditional ways of meeting romantic partners.  For someone who tends to be shy, the intimacy through distance that online dating sites provide makes it easier for such people to interact with others.  Also, it may be easier to face rejection if it is done in an e-mail or online message than if done face- to- face.

One’s pride may feel less wounded from such a form of rejection as opposed to an emotionally-laced trodding upon one’s proverbial heart in a face-to-face encounter.

Another benefit of online dating is that you can look through the profiles of people you find physically attractive to see if you even have anything in common.  It is terrible to be on a date with someone who you think is beautiful or handsome, only to find them excruciatingly boring.  They want to talk about cars and you are gushing about the foreign film you saw last week.

So, dating sites are common, and there is no shame in using one, no matter what your reason.

There is a principle espoused by Dr. Stephen Covey in his seminal work “The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People” which has a place of great importance in relating.  This particular attitude, or principle, is definitely an important part of any successful romantic relationship when Polish Dating.  I’m referring to the principle of “Seek first to understand.”

Seek first to understand is the cornerstone of good communication because it is essentially the formula for (the “how”) of great communication.  It involves empathic listening.

When we listen to what another person is saying to us we are usually also preparing what we are going to say next, based on our point of view.  We are spending most of our energies on coming up with some witty response, or an effective rebuttal.

What the principle of “Seek first to understand” tells us is that we should be using our energies to listen with empathy to every word, idea, and nuance of what the other in an interaction is saying.  This requires us to listen with our hearts as well as our ears, and mind.  In fact it requires that listening with our hearts be the main thing.

Of course, the principle of “Seek first to understand” is incomplete without the second half of the equation, which is secondary in implementation, but not necessarily second in importance.  This second half is: “then seek to be understood”.

Now that you have listened with empathy, you understand deeply the perception, needs, and emotions of your partner in a communicative interaction.  With such knowledge in hand, you can now express your own perception, needs, and emotions clearly, in the context of your partner’s values and paradigm.

The importance of the principle of “Seek first to understand, and then to be understood.” in romantic relationships is readily apparent.  It is a way to communicate with the intention of a peaceful resolution as uppermost in one’s mind, and love in one’s heart.

With the complexity of life and relationships today, it is wise to know and practice this principle.  It can only serve to develop a deeper relationship with your romantic partner.  Even if you don’t have a romantic partner at the moment and are seeking one online through dating sites, speeddate, etc. or are using more traditional avenues to acquire a partner, this principle can benefit you with all relationships, romantic or otherwise.